As a sexually liberated Gay man, there’s one staple of “Gay culture” that I’ve been quite fond of over the years: Cruising. Cruising has given me opportunities to explore myself sexually and, in turn, learn about myself, as a whole (or a whole hoe…either works). Not to mention, it just makes sex that much more fun. However, there’s a few common things I’ve seen and experienced in cruising spaces that confuse me, if not put me off. I feel like I’m not alone in any of these, so let’s share:
I was just browsing Twitter, minding my own business (prolly browsing thirst traps), when I came across this:
This is just the latest in an ongoing trend of police departments showing how “down” they are with the Gays.
(If you’ve followed my work for any length of time, you likely know what’s coming)
Granted, this really isn’t much unlike any other performative showing of solidarity or “allyship.” But there’s something especially insidious about police adopting this display. Let’s break it down, shall we? [Read more…]
Continuing the “Gay shit” for Pride 2017, I thought this would be a good time to revisit a rant I’ve made before. Of course, said rant, in its original form, is currently unavailable, because fuck Twitter. So, might as well recreate it in blog form. I wanna take this time to break down why “Love Is Love” is a terrible way to advocate for LGBTQ people. Particularly, since this recently popped up on my Facebook news feed:
As with most any other trendy form of activism, “Love is Love” seems innocent enough on its face. It’s another form of pushing the message of equality for LGBTQ people…to advocate that we’re “just like” the heteros.
…but here’s one issue with that: [Read more…]
It didn’t even take one week on the new Twitter account for representatives from the Child Support Is the Enemy of The Black Man™ contingent of Twitter to make its way into my mentions with this mess:
First of all, if you’re referring to HIV as “the finisher” in 2017, you have no room in these conversations. It’s been commonly known, for years, that HIV, when diagnosed and treated early, can yield normal life expectancy. Never mind that it’s probably AIDS that you’re thinking about, not HIV. For that matter, if you still don’t know that HIV & AIDS aren’t the same thing, you should also have a few seats. Also, people who imply that HIV+ people “deserve” to die because of “sexual deviancy” are their own, special brand of evil.
Second, I see this kind of rhetoric from cishets regularly. It plagued my mentions on @angryblackhoemo, and will likely follow me, for as long as I have a social media presence, in general. But let’s be perfectly clear: this has absolutely nothing to do with “concern” or HIV prevention. [Read more…]
Disclaimer: This will be mostly semi-coherent rambling
…so, only mildly different than my usual posts. lol
If you’re reading this, you already know the hoteps and/or yt supremacists finally got me and @angryblackhoemo is no more.
In response to my (what appears to be permanent) suspension from Twitter, just putting this out there to answer the questions that have come up:
1) I have no idea what, specifically, caused my suspension…in most cases, no one does. The reason cited by Twitter (non-)support was “targeted abuse.” Nothing more, nothing less. Twitter is deliberately vague about how their policies are implemented. Often times on these white male-owned platforms, POC/LGBTQ folks pushing back against bigots is seen as “abusive behavior” and Twitter will respond by reprimanding us (while often letting white supremacists & homophobes go, unchecked). I probably just told one homophobe too many to drink bleach.
2) The response I got seemed pretty clear that “@angryblackhoemo” is gone and it ain’t coming back. Hoteps/yt supremacists rejoice!
3) Yes, the new account is here…however…
Rethinking how I use Twitter is something I’ve long known I need to do, but now I’m in a position where I’m kinda forced to do it. I have no interest in doing things the same way as I did with @angryblackhoemo. Rebuilding all of the content and connections is a daunting task, in and of itself…but even more so when I know it’d ultimately just result in the same thing. Problematic shit that I’ve had to unlearn notwithstanding, I don’t regret much of anything I expressed on Twitter via @angryblackhoemo. Given that, I’d be engaging the same way, so no use even investing all of that creative energy.
Plus, I’ve been saying for the longest that *we* willingly hand over too much content to these white/male-owned platforms that clearly see us as vessels for exploitation and abuse. I’m not sure I wanna practically beg to be granted space in those kinds of environments. Twitter, Facebook at al don’t deserve our brilliance.
I considered not bothering with returning, but, for my experience, the positives of the platform (engagement, being on top of current events, learning so many new perspectives, rapid communication, etc.) outweigh the negatives. Not to mention, in today’s climate, I’m not sure I can truly and effectively do what I do without some kind of presenence on Twitter. So I’m definitely rethinking ways to better utilize the platform to ultimately keep ownership of my content (i.e. rerouting traffic to my blog). Hell, I might just end up going right back to old social media habits and prove this to all be bullshit. lol
Still mulling it all over, but it lowkey feels like a fresh start. With @angryblackhoemo, everything was very much by the seat of my pants, figuring it out as I go. In this instance, I’m basically beginning with a lot of shit figured out. So we’ll see how it goes. Part of me actually feels a sense of clarity and an opportunity to breathe…and that’s the part that feels better than the hurt and panic of losing ~133 thousand tweets and over 12,000 followers in the blink of an eye. So why not go with the positive?
Still thinking…you’ll know once I do.
For now, feel free to follow the new account, tho (I reserve the right to change the @ at any given moment, tho).