So, I addressed my lack of fucks to give for fragile white feelings in Part 1, but I’m Angry Black HoeMo…I wasn’t gonna only cover one side of the problematic fence. I have reads for everyone. This one is going to be a bit less focused than the last one, but it’s all things that need to be said and heard (and to clarify what you’re getting when you’re on this blog), all the same.
While we’re addressing fragile, bigoted ass people, let me go on and take a swipe at you asswipes who say crap like this:
(Similarly to Part 1, I’m gonna step out of character and address the newbies and/or bigots who I’m generally not targeting with my writing, anyway…but again, this series is called Disclaimer.)
Now, for you cishet folks who feel a way about the term because you only see the word come up in a negative context, well…too damn bad. That comes with the territory of being the default. I’m cisgender and, purely in terms of gender, I’m the default…thus, I never have to think in terms of gender. The (post-colonial) world was built with cisgender people in mind, so it’s just innate for us. If you, as a cis person, never have to think about gender (thus don’t need to use the term cisgender) and trans people do, of course it’s primarily gonna come up in conversations around trans issues…and sense we cisgender people are the primary source of oppression of trans people, that’s where the topic will come up. The same applies to being “cishet.” Being cisgender and heterosexual is the default—it’s what (again, post-colonized) society has traditionally centered around. If you truly fit into that default, then you never have to think of the alternatives, thus you wouldn’t need to label it unless it’s to make space for those who don’t fall under “cishet.”
You think any white people would be thinking about race, at all, if not for Black folks and other people of color bringing up the issue? Of course not. Hey…here’s an idea: For all of you Black/POC, cishet folks who feel this way, why don’t meet up with all of the “all-lies” who are pissy over the term “wypipo” (and even the ones who also feel a way about “cishet”) and organize a march to address how “oppressed” you are at how these words hurt your precious widdle feels? Maybe it can finally be that “White, Cis, Straight Pride” parade that y’all keep clamoring over.
Fact is, for a lot of us LGBTQ folks, cishet people are a primary thief of our safety…the issues around that should be exposed and talked about. We say about white people, all the time, that their feelings don’t take precedence over Black lives, and the same principle applies, here. Your fragile, cishet feelings do not get to be spared, just so you can comfortably continue forcing your patriarchal bullshit on the rest of us.
On another note, I have absolutely no interest in entertaining this “I love LGBTQ people but don’t agree with their ‘lifestyle'” bullshit? The notion that attraction to the same sex or identifying as a different gender than what you were assigned is a “lifestyle” is antiquated. It’s only considered a “lifestyle” because y’all have put so many requirements on how men and women are “supposed” to behave and act (more on that in a minute). The notion that the people I just innately have an inclination towards is something for you to disagree with is extremely entitled and just, plain ignorant. It’s based in the false belief that you can choose who you’re attracted to—as if any of you homophobes have ever made a conscious decision that you’re gonna find a person attractive…because that’s how attraction works…apparently.
Furthermore, I find it incredibly ironic how so many cishet folks (primarily men) wanna chastise men like me for being overly-sensitive, while y’all are the ones too afraid to do…well, just about anything, out of fear that you’d be deemed “gay.” So many of y’all walk around with asses that smell like raw sewage, all because you think thoroughly cleaning your ass makes you a gay bottom (and I know this from experience, because I had to suck off enough of y’all on the low during my more naive years).
…but that’s another read for another day.
Point is, we have a lot of issues with cishet folks that need to be worked out and we’re not gonna avoid confronting those issues just to make you comfortable. I’m a Black, Queer man and I don’t feel I should have to downplay or sacrifice one in favor of the other. Similar to wypipo, your fake “allyship” isn’t needed or welcomed. Instead of being mad at us for airing legitimate grievances, perhaps listen to what we’re saying and try do do better. Get over yourselves.
And for the Black cishet homophobes/transphobes, it needs to be pointed out that, no matter how much you like to deny this being the case, being LGBTQ does not disqualify one from Blackness. Our interactions with the world are informed by our race as much as our sexual/romantic attractions and/or gender identities…not to mention, our race heavily informs our experiences being LGBTQ, and very much vice-versa.
Finally, I think it’s also important to point out that, if you are a cisgender and/or heterosexual person who is feigns offense at terms like “cis,” “cisgender” and “cishet,” in all likelihood you’re homophobic and/or transphobic…y’all love running away from that simple fact, but you should just own up to, accept it, and please stay the hell away from us.
Similarly to white people, y’all LGBTQ-phobes need to know that I’m not a respectable Black HoeMo (I mean…I call myself a HoeMo) and I have no interest in being nice and patient with you. You can simply listen to what we’re saying, put your ego aside and enlighten yourself, or you’re getting nothing beyond a read (and/or block) from me. Really, though…stay the hell away from us.
Thanks and you’re welcome.
P.S. …and one more thing. This argument of “I’ve never heard this word before so it’s not real”…could you possibly live any further up your own (probably unwashed)* ass? Language evolves…there are new words added to the dictionary, constantly. Stop acting like this is a real argument when most of you had no problem adopting terms like “On Fleek” (…well…until white people overdid it and ruined it, anyway).
* Once again…really, though, y’all cishet dudes need to do better with washing your asses and crotch areas. I regularly hear from the women (and men that some of y’all get with on the low) and…it’s tragic. Just letting you know. ☕
If you enjoyed this post or any of my other work, and consider supporting my efforts with a donation!